I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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