k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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