When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
