I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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