On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Randomize
