Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Randomize
