it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
