Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize