You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
