dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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