who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
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