Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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