There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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