Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
