Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
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