You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
