Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

***** fucked a guy with one hand last night

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(818): View more from California

Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...

(714): View more from California

Didn't you just get a DUI last week?

(818): View more from California

Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it

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(530): View more from California

Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds

(1-530): View more from California

Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.

(740): View more from Ohio

Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.

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(613): View more from Ontario

i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized

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