I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I think people are normalizing furries
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
