i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
