3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Randomize
