Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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