Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
