I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
