Please don't use social media to get back at me.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Randomize
