awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
