I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize