I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
