So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
