some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
