I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
