I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize