You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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