the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
All the doctor said was why
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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