He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
