he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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