the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
