Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
