Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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