hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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