I don't think brook has ever known best
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
We are all done wearing pants today
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
