so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize