office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
