I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
You're breaking my sexual little heart
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
