He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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