What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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