Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize