Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
