Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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