just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Well I just put wine in my tea
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
