Everything about him screamed your future.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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