I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I just googled if crying burns calories
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize